Chocobone (WIP)

Contribute art for mainline Wesnoth.

Moderators: Forum Moderators, Developers

Forum rules
Before posting critique in this forum, you must read the following thread:
User avatar
Antonius
Posts: 43
Joined: August 16th, 2009, 2:18 pm
Location: Tomorrow
Contact:

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by Antonius »

Really?

Because of the shading and linework differences, I recognize that is his hand, not his adams apple, which the pictures of chocobos do not have.

You seem to be a master of odd spritework interpretation, remembering the post that you made in neoskel's swashbuckler......
My computer just got back to me with a new hardrive...
Do you know the magic word,
Seldom seen and often heard?

User avatar
A-Red
Art Contributor
Posts: 495
Joined: May 6th, 2009, 1:21 am

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by A-Red »

Getting there.

Image

User avatar
Aethaeryn
Translator
Posts: 1553
Joined: September 15th, 2007, 10:21 pm
Location: Baltimore, Maryland, USA

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by Aethaeryn »

A-Red wrote:Getting there.

Image
Why an axe? I thought it had a piercing charge attack.
Aethaeryn (User Page)
Wiki Moderator (wiki)
Latin Translator [wiki=Latin Translation](wiki)[/wiki]
Maintainer of Thunderstone Era (wiki) and Aethaeryn's Maps [wiki=Aethaeryn's Maps](wiki)[/wiki]

User avatar
Zerovirus
Art Contributor
Posts: 1693
Joined: July 8th, 2009, 4:51 pm

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by Zerovirus »

Couldn't you make the chocobo's skull more interesting? Something like:
Image?

Just the one hole for the eye doesn't seem all that realistic. A few depressions in the skull, at least.

User avatar
A-Red
Art Contributor
Posts: 495
Joined: May 6th, 2009, 1:21 am

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by A-Red »

My reference, again:

http://www.copyrightexpired.com/earlyim ... atryma.jpg

I do see a bit more detail there, but I don't think I've got the space to make it look good. Most of the skull is beak.

User avatar
A-Red
Art Contributor
Posts: 495
Joined: May 6th, 2009, 1:21 am

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by A-Red »

I consider the base frame to be complete now, though not necessarily finalized. Let me know what I can still improve.

Image

cretin
Posts: 357
Joined: June 28th, 2007, 2:57 pm
Location: Virginia

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by cretin »

i dont know if your planning on adding it, but a tail wouldnt hurt. otherwise, i dont know it just looks weird.

Blarumyrran
Art Contributor
Posts: 1700
Joined: December 7th, 2006, 8:08 pm

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by Blarumyrran »

Not good enough methinks.
  • Violating our standard perspective, the legs are on the same level. They shouldnt be - his right leg should be lower down than his left.
  • Armor lacks contrast & is somewhat pillowshaded
  • As said, should probably have spear instead of poleaxe
  • The new-style (mostly jetryl's) sprites are _big_, your skeleton is small.
  • Adding the helmet for the bird is very likely not to work out - the steed in question is not a common wesnoth feature, and showing as much of its head as you can is only good.
  • I dont understand the bone things below his neck. Ribs are an easy but atmospheric part of skeletons that you should certainly not be afraid of.
  • This is much my personal preference, but id lose the headband.

AI
Developer
Posts: 2394
Joined: January 31st, 2008, 8:38 pm

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by AI »

As aethaeryn said, his weapon looks more like an axe or halberd than a spear.

User avatar
A-Red
Art Contributor
Posts: 495
Joined: May 6th, 2009, 1:21 am

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by A-Red »

Blarumyrran wrote:Not good enough methinks.
  • Violating our standard perspective, the legs are on the same level. They shouldnt be - his right leg should be lower down than his left.
  • Armor lacks contrast & is somewhat pillowshaded
  • As said, should probably have spear instead of poleaxe
  • The new-style (mostly jetryl's) sprites are _big_, your skeleton is small.
  • Adding the helmet for the bird is very likely not to work out - the steed in question is not a common wesnoth feature, and showing as much of its head as you can is only good.
  • I dont understand the bone things below his neck. Ribs are an easy but atmospheric part of skeletons that you should certainly not be afraid of.
  • This is much my personal preference, but id lose the headband.
Thanks for the thorough criticism. The overall size has been pretty much ok'ed, I think, as neither Jetrel nor TSI mentioned it in their posts in this thread--it's absolutely huge compared to the original, and it's about the same height as Jetrel's new mounted units, with less width simply because it's bipedal. The weapon in the original sprite looks like an attempt at a halberd to me, but *I'd* prefer a spear too, so I'll change it. It looked a bit bare to me without the bird's armor and the headband, but I see what you mean on both counts. I'll fix the issues with the bones and armor as well as I can, though I don't think I want to remove the vestigial wing-bones, because it makes a lot of sense for the bird to have them.

User avatar
thespaceinvader
Retired Art Director
Posts: 8414
Joined: August 25th, 2007, 10:12 am
Location: Oxford, UK
Contact:

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by thespaceinvader »

http://www.wesnoth.org/units/trunk/C/Chocobone.html

Check the units database when thinking about weapons ;) Conceptually, the headband looks fine to me, but if you do use it, it needs to curve with the skull, rather than being perfectly horizontal.

I'd agree with the comments about the armour, particularly on the bird's head. The legs should be at different levels.

I like the vestigial wing bones personally, but I'm reasonably sure that they shouldn't be there, if this beastie is supposed to be a shoutout to final fantasy - Chocobos only have 2 limbs, i believe.
http://thespaceinvader.co.uk | http://thespaceinvader.deviantart.com
Back to work. Current projects: Catching up on commits. Picking Meridia back up. Sprite animations, many and varied.

lostnumber
Posts: 197
Joined: September 23rd, 2008, 1:06 am

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by lostnumber »

thespaceinvader wrote:http://www.wesnoth.org/units/trunk/C/Chocobone.html

Check the units database when thinking about weapons ;) Conceptually, the headband looks fine to me, but if you do use it, it needs to curve with the skull, rather than being perfectly horizontal.

I'd agree with the comments about the armour, particularly on the bird's head. The legs should be at different levels.

I like the vestigial wing bones personally, but I'm reasonably sure that they shouldn't be there, if this beastie is supposed to be a shoutout to final fantasy - Chocobos only have 2 limbs, i believe.
Chocobos most definitely have wings. Although most of them can't fly the one in FF9 does if you progress far enough in the minigame

User avatar
thespaceinvader
Retired Art Director
Posts: 8414
Joined: August 25th, 2007, 10:12 am
Location: Oxford, UK
Contact:

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by thespaceinvader »

Fair enough. The vestigial wings are perfectly fine them, to my mind.
http://thespaceinvader.co.uk | http://thespaceinvader.deviantart.com
Back to work. Current projects: Catching up on commits. Picking Meridia back up. Sprite animations, many and varied.

User avatar
A-Red
Art Contributor
Posts: 495
Joined: May 6th, 2009, 1:21 am

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by A-Red »

Image

User avatar
thespaceinvader
Retired Art Director
Posts: 8414
Joined: August 25th, 2007, 10:12 am
Location: Oxford, UK
Contact:

Re: Chocobone (WIP)

Post by thespaceinvader »

Brighter brights on the metals. Otherwise, looks pretty good to me.
http://thespaceinvader.co.uk | http://thespaceinvader.deviantart.com
Back to work. Current projects: Catching up on commits. Picking Meridia back up. Sprite animations, many and varied.

Post Reply