Need Criticism: Slave

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Raelifin
Posts: 21
Joined: May 7th, 2005, 7:54 am

Need Criticism: Slave

Post by Raelifin »

Hi, I just found Wesnoth a few days ago and have been studying it quite closely. I thought I might try my hand making a unit. This is my FIRST TRY so please try to keep outright dismissal to a low and focus on what needs improving. Yes, I hope to be animating it later.

Basic premise: Slave fodder.
Attachments
Slave base image.
Slave base image.
slave.PNG (1.03 KiB) Viewed 2236 times
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
-Lewis Carroll "Jabberwocky"

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Elvish_Pillager
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Post by Elvish_Pillager »

Nice job! It's not even too bad for a try way past your first.

Things that aren't so good: The eyes are too big. In Wesnoth, eyes tend to be 2 pixels by 2 pixels, so those extra light pixels on top have no place. Also, the thing needs shading -- the surfaces are to flat and the lines to abrupt. Near dark lines, the surface should be darker, and near light sources, the lines and surfaces shouldn't be so dark.

Also, a not-so-art-related thing: Slaves shouldn't have chains on their hands, how do you expect them to work for you if they're chained up? If anything, it should be chains on their ankles, so they can't run away.
It's all fun and games until someone loses a lawsuit. Oh, and by the way, sending me private messages won't work. :/ If you must contact me, there's an e-mail address listed on the website in my profile.

scott
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Location: Alexandria, VA

Post by scott »

It seems like the hair should cover his right ear some more. It's ok if you want him to have a mullet, but he already has a lot of hair over his left ear.
Hope springs eternal.
Wesnoth acronym guide.

elscouta
Posts: 46
Joined: November 21st, 2004, 1:47 pm

Post by elscouta »

Is it only me, or is he smiling? He seems really too happy for a slave. Otherwise, it looks good

Raelifin
Posts: 21
Joined: May 7th, 2005, 7:54 am

Post by Raelifin »

Thanks for the fast input. Try this one on for size:
Attachments
slave.PNG
slave.PNG (1.07 KiB) Viewed 2201 times
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
-Lewis Carroll "Jabberwocky"

aelius
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Joined: August 30th, 2004, 8:07 pm
Location: Virginia, USA

Post by aelius »

If he's a slave, you might want to consider putting some chains or whatnot on him. It's quite good, otherwise.

- b.
La perfection est atteinte non quand il ne reste rien à ajouter, mais quand il ne reste rien à enlever. - Antoine de Saint Exupery (of course)

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Elvish_Pillager
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Post by Elvish_Pillager »

aelius wrote:If he's a slave, you might want to consider putting some chains or whatnot on him. It's quite good, otherwise.

- b.
His ankles are chained, it's just a bit hard to see.
It's all fun and games until someone loses a lawsuit. Oh, and by the way, sending me private messages won't work. :/ If you must contact me, there's an e-mail address listed on the website in my profile.

Shadow
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Post by Shadow »

Yes nice work but it still looks like he´s smiling
... all romantics meet the same fate someday
Cynical and drunk and boring someone in some dark cafe ...
All good dreamers pass this way some day
Hidin’ behind bottles in dark cafes

Raelifin
Posts: 21
Joined: May 7th, 2005, 7:54 am

Post by Raelifin »

I tweaked the eyes so they look a bit smaller (IMHO) and sadder.

I also think I figured out the smile thing. by puting gloss on the front of the face it creates a bighter line which could add to the appearance of a smile. I'm not sure what to do about it. Any ideas?
Attachments
slave.PNG
slave.PNG (1.07 KiB) Viewed 2128 times
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
-Lewis Carroll "Jabberwocky"

Shadow
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Joined: September 9th, 2004, 10:27 am
Location: Following the steps of Goethe
Contact:

Post by Shadow »

Make the head a little bit smaller and fade out the dark lines under the chin you have made a unit with a head and a neck most units in Wesnoth got no neck because you look with a 45° degree on them.
... all romantics meet the same fate someday
Cynical and drunk and boring someone in some dark cafe ...
All good dreamers pass this way some day
Hidin’ behind bottles in dark cafes

Raelifin
Posts: 21
Joined: May 7th, 2005, 7:54 am

Post by Raelifin »

I disagree with fading the head. Some units have a more top down look than others. I proportioned this unit off of the elves whom are less so. I did however try to shrink the neck and make the front of the head less like a snout. :) I tweaked the chain too.
Attachments
slave2.PNG
slave2.PNG (1.08 KiB) Viewed 2102 times
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
-Lewis Carroll "Jabberwocky"

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Jetrel
Art Director
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Joined: February 23rd, 2004, 3:36 am
Location: Midwest US

Post by Jetrel »

He has chains on his angles. Good.

Give him a ball of steel attached to those chains. This will make it visually obvious that he has chains on his ankles.


With sprite art, those kinds of details that are central to the identity of the unit need to be exaggerated so that no one misses them.

Raelifin
Posts: 21
Joined: May 7th, 2005, 7:54 am

Post by Raelifin »

Actualy, thats a good point. Originaly I considered the idea to be too cliche but it would add to the recognisability of the unit. Somthing is wrong with the new picture. The ball and chain looks off somehow.
Attachments
slave3.PNG
slave3.PNG (1.2 KiB) Viewed 2048 times
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
-Lewis Carroll "Jabberwocky"

scott
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Joined: May 12th, 2004, 12:35 am
Location: Alexandria, VA

Post by scott »

the shadow makes the ball look deformed. You could also try a smaller ball if the guy is going to have a movement >1.
Hope springs eternal.
Wesnoth acronym guide.

MadMax
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Location: Weldyn, Wesnoth

Post by MadMax »

When these graphics are completed, I may have a use for them.
"ILLEGITIMIS NON CARBORUNDUM"

Father of Flight to Freedom
http://www.wesnoth.org/wiki/FlightToFreedom

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