Proposed Race Description For Wose

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Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby the_beagle » May 30th, 2013, 4:17 am

It was pointed out to me that portions of the Wesnoth race cannon remain unfinished in some areas. As directed I have put together an overall description of the Wose race. Any feedback is welcome and I am open to any reasonable suggestions. This description follows mainline Wesnoth, which it is intended for, and any cannon mistakes or improvements are especially of interest!

Wose
The mighty Wose resides within the oldest forests of Irdya. To the untrained eye the Wose appears to be nothing more than a noble, if not oddly shaped, tree. As guardians of the forest, the Wose share a deeper connection to the woodlands than even the elves themselves. While the Wose are a peaceful race, disturbance of the ancient forests which they tend will incite a wrath greater than that of Mother Nature herself. Wose are slow moving creatures that may spend centuries standing in one location undisturbed by the ebb and flow of time.
Although they practice no magic of their own the Wose share a deep connection to faerie. It is thought by Elven scholars that this mystical power which mightiest Slyphs and Shydes dedicate their lives to master is inherent to the Wose. Though they resemble trees, they share no ancestry with the forest itself. Elvish scholars believe that the existence of the Wose may predate the settlement of Wesnoth itself, and that the power of faerie has given these beings the eternal task of serving as wardens of the forest.
The Wose are not warlike in the least and are ill-served in combat. Wose are slow moving and are vulnerable away from the woodlands. Their thick bark and ability to harness their faerie to regenerate quickly when injured allows this being to survive an enemy onslaught long enough to respond with crushing might belied by its peaceful, plodding nature. Within its forest home, the Wose can disappear among the trees and ambush even the most trained elven scout.
The life span of the Wose is unknown, although the most ancient members of this race have lived many hundreds of years and have grown to massive heights. It is thought that unless a Wose falls in battle, it will find no natural end. Content to pass the centuries standing like a sentry, uninterested in the goings-on of the civilized world, the Wose will stir only to march to the defense of the natural world and the forests they call home.


Update: I realized that I have excluded the Wose shaman and weakness to fire/magic sensitivity. I will update these tomorrow, however I am aware of their importance to the race!
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby zookeeper » May 30th, 2013, 6:28 am

Looks pretty good to me overall, but a few points...

It's kind of conventional that "Irdya" isn't mentioned in-game except in context of particularly arcane knowledge. Also, "Mother Nature" seems a bit out of place considering that (AFAIK) there doesn't seem to be such a concept in Wesnoth.

I wouldn't say that they're ill-served in combat, or even particularly peaceful; they're pretty tough and dangerous after all, and while they're obviously not warlike in the usual sense, they can presumably defend their habitat rather aggressively and indiscriminately.

Finally, it would be nice if you could also rework the descriptions of the Wose and Elder Wose a bit, because this will make parts of them redundant.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby Elfarion » May 30th, 2013, 8:10 am

I like your suggestion!
Apart from what zookeeper said about "mother nature" one little thing:

the_beagle wrote:Wose
disturbance of the ancient forests which they tend will incite a wrath greater than that of Mother Nature herself.


Greater than nature itself? To me it sounds a bit weird given that woses are guarding the woods. How could they be superior to nature? Maybe make it:
" will incite the wrath of nature itself"?
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby the_beagle » May 31st, 2013, 10:38 pm

It's kind of conventional that "Irdya" isn't mentioned in-game except in context of particularly arcane knowledge. Also, "Mother Nature" seems a bit out of place considering that (AFAIK) there doesn't seem to be such a concept in Wesnoth.
Very good points Zookeeper along with the rest of your post, exactly the type of input I was hoping for I will work the changes in!

Finally, it would be nice if you could also rework the descriptions of the Wose and Elder Wose a bit, because this will make parts of them redundant.

Okay, I will certainly see what changes can be made to them!

Elfarion,
Greater than nature itself? To me it sounds a bit weird given that woses are guarding the woods. How could they be superior to nature? Maybe make it:
" will incite the wrath of nature itself"?
I totally overlooked that bit of phrasing, makes perfect sense, thank you!
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby Kanzil » June 8th, 2013, 8:37 pm

I have a couple of questions and grammatical quibbles. Firstly, you speak of
the power of faerie
as if it is a person. Is there a basis for that?
Secondly, you say "most trained"; it is probably better English to say "best trained". Thirdly, I think the phrase "with crushing might belied by its peaceful, plodding nature" should have an "a" before the "crushing might".
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby shadowm » June 8th, 2013, 10:50 pm

Kanzil wrote:I have a couple of questions and grammatical quibbles. Firstly, you speak of
the power of faerie
as if it is a person. Is there a basis for that?

Note that there is some existing precedent in mainline (from ESR, if my memory serves) for ‘faerie’ as a concept.

data/campaigns/An_Orcish_Incursion/scenarios/05_Linaera_the_Quick.cfg:
Code: Select all
        [message]
            speaker=narrator
            #po: "Faerie" in this paragraph is a rare, poetic word in
            #po: English. It is the proper name of a magical otherworld
            #po: associated with elves - actually, originally with
            #po: fairies, but before Tolkien the boundary between elves
            #po: and fairies was extremely blurry. In Wesnoth it is
            #po: deliberately unclear whether Faerie is a place that is
            #po: the source of magical power or a label for the inner
            #po: nonhuman/magical nature of the Elves.  Translate freely.
            message=_ "Erlornas closed his eyes and brought his hands forward, joined palms forming a cup open to the sky. Soon they began to glow, then to flare like a brazier with the fire of Faerie, casting a cold, blue light all around the elf-lord. A wisp of light emerged from the eerie flames, and at a few murmured words from the elf-lord flew away towards the tower below. Then the light around Erlornas faded and all was seemingly as before."
            image=wesnoth-icon.png
        [/message]
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby the_beagle » June 12th, 2013, 11:07 pm

Hello all, thank you so much for your input! I will be incorporating it directly into another draft which should be up tonight. I apologize for my inactivity on this thread, work got crazy. Again thank you all very much!
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby the_beagle » June 13th, 2013, 12:03 am

Okay, I have incorporated the changes suggested and have also added the Wose Shaman and their weakness to fire/arcane. If anyone has any suggestions please don't hesitate to point them out!

Wose

The mighty Wose resides within the deepest forests of Wesnoth. To the untrained eye, the Wose appears to be nothing more than a noble, if not oddly shaped, tree. As guardians of the forest, they share a deeper connection to the woodlands than even the elves themselves. While the Wose are a peaceful race, disturbance of the ancient forests which they tend will incite the wrath of nature itself. Wose are slow moving creatures that may spend centuries standing in one location undisturbed by the ebb and flow of time.

Although they practice no magic of their own, the Wose share a deep connection to faerie. It is thought by Elven scholars that this mystical power, which the mightiest slyphs and shydes dedicate their lives to master, is inherent to the Wose. Though they resemble them, they share no ancestry with the trees themselves. Elvish scholars believe that the existence of the Wose may predate the settlement of Wesnoth itself, and that the power of faerie has given these beings the eternal task of serving as wardens of the forest.

As their lives progress some Wose gain deeper insight into the workings of the forest. Wose Shaman, through their connection with the woodland flora can command vines to rise up and entangle trespassers within their grasp. This ability both hinders the enemy’s ability to inflict harm on either the Wose or the forest and slows the escape or movement of the enemy to that of a Wose. The power to animate the trees and plants of the forest is beyond the understanding of human Magi however Elven shaman also share this ability and it is thought, by Elvish scholars, that this power over nature is granted through a deep understanding of faerie.

Wose are not warlike in the least and are ill-served in combat. They will however respond with indiscriminant violence in defense of their forested territory. Wose are slow moving and are vulnerable away from the woodlands. Due to their close connection with faerie, they are very vulnerable to arcane attacks. Also, as many an Orcish archer has discovered, even the mightiest Wose can also be felled by fire. The hardwood that makes the Wose near impervious to physical assault has left it extremely vulnerable to flame. Their thick bark and ability to harness their faerie to regenerate quickly when injured allows this being to survive an enemy onslaught long enough to respond with a crushing might belied by its peaceful, plodding nature. Within its forest home, the Wose can disappear amongst the trees and ambush even the best trained elven scout.

The life span of the Wose is unknown, although the most ancient members of this race have lived many hundreds of years and have grown to massive heights. It is thought that unless a Wose falls in battle, it will find no natural end. Content to pass the centuries standing like a sentry, uninterested in the goings-on of the civilized world, the Wose will stir only to march to the defense of the natural world and the forests they call home.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby Elfarion » June 13th, 2013, 6:58 am

I like it!
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby aquileia » June 13th, 2013, 1:51 pm

Nice to see this being done! However, some nitpicking:

the_beagle wrote:It is thought by Elven scholars that this mystical power
Elvish scholars believe that
it is thought, by Elvish scholars,

Instead of repeating this thrice, you could write once that not much is known about woses and what little there is has been contributed by elves.

the_beagle wrote:the existence of the Wose may predate the settlement of Wesnoth itself


It does - you probably mean the Great Continent instead of the kingdom of Wesnoth, or did I misunderstand you?

the_beagle wrote:Wose Shaman, through their

The plural is shamans - see Merriam Webster.

the_beagle wrote:even the mightiest Wose can also be felled by fire.

I am no native speaker, but I'd delete the "also" - it is redundant.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby Lord-Knightmare » June 13th, 2013, 2:47 pm

This should definitely be accepted into core. But a few errors are visible I see. Most of them have been pointed out and here's one more:

The mighty Wose resides within the deepest forests of Wesnoth.


Woses are found in almost in any ancient forest in Irdya, so I suggest to change the last part of the sentence to something like this:-
The mighty Wose resides within the deepest forests of the known world.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby the_beagle » June 14th, 2013, 4:48 am

Thank you very much for this round of edits, as with all other editing rounds! All are appreciated! Aquileia: Very good suggestions, I have addressed them. Lord-Knightmare: Thanks to you as well; its little details like that are so important to a good description! Elfarion:
I like it!
Thank you, I hope those with proper authorities feel the same! :wink:

Ok! Here is the third draft of the descriptions with all suggested changes incorporated!

Wose

The mighty Wose resides within the deepest forests the known world. To the untrained eye, the Wose appears to be nothing more than a noble, if not oddly shaped, tree. As guardians of the forest, the Wose share a deeper connection to the woodlands than even the elves themselves. While the Wose are a peaceful race, disturbance of the ancient forests which they tend will incite the wrath of nature itself. Wose are slow moving creatures that may spend centuries standing in one location undisturbed by the ebb and flow of time.

Although they practice no magic of their own, the Wose share a deep connection to faerie. What little is known of this ancient race comes from Elven scholars who believe that this mystical power, which the mightiest slyphs and shydes dedicate their lives to master, is inherent to the Wose. Though they resemble them, they share no ancestry with the trees themselves. It is believed that the existence of the Wose may predate the settlement of the Great Continent itself, and that the power of faerie has given these beings the eternal task of serving as wardens of the forest.

As their lives progress some Wose gain deeper insight into the workings of the forest. Wose Shamans, through their connection with the woodland flora, can command vines to rise up and entangle trespassers within their grasp. This ability both hinders the enemy’s ability to inflict harm on either the Wose or the forest and slows the escape or movement of the enemy to that of a Wose. The power to animate the trees and plants of the forest is beyond the understanding of human Magi, however Elven shamans also share this ability and it is thought that this power over nature is granted through a deep understanding of faerie.

Wose are not warlike in the least and are ill-served in combat. They will however respond with indiscriminant violence in defense of their forested territory. Wose are slow moving and are vulnerable away from the woodlands. Due to their close connection with faerie, Wose are very vulnerable to arcane attacks. Also, as many an Orcish archer has discovered, even the mightiest Wose can be felled by fire. The hardwood that makes the Wose near impervious to physical assault has left it extremely vulnerable to flame. Their thick bark and ability to harness their faerie to regenerate quickly when injured allows this being to survive an enemy onslaught long enough to respond with a crushing might belied by its peaceful, plodding nature. Within its forest home, the Wose can disappear amongst the trees and ambush even the best trained elven scout.

The life span of the Wose is unknown, although the most ancient members of this race have lived many hundreds of years and have grown to massive heights. It is thought that unless a Wose falls in battle, it will find no natural end. Content to pass the centuries standing like a sentry, uninterested in the goings-on of the civilized world, the Wose will stir only to march to the defense of the natural world and the forests they call home.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby Lord-Knightmare » June 14th, 2013, 10:01 am

The third draft's perfect :D , but you seemed to have missed a preposition 'of' in the first sentence.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby 8680 » June 14th, 2013, 8:18 pm

Meaning no offense, here are some corrections and comments.

The mighty wose [race names are not capitalized] resides within the deepest forests the known world. To the untrained eye, the wose appears to be nothing more than a noble, if ˻not˼ oddly shaped, tree [Should that “not” be deleted? I don’t see the point of stating that a tree is not oddly shaped, and going by LordBob’s sketches, that would seem to be incorrect.]. As guardians of the forest, the woses [the plural form is “woses”, according to data/core/units.cfg] share a deeper connection to the woodlands than even the elves ˻themselves˼ [this “themselves” feels like it should be deleted, though I don’t know exactly why]. While the woses are a peaceful race, disturbance of the ancient forests which they tend will incite the wrath of nature itself [I’m no expert on canon, but didn’t zookeeper say that Wesnoth doesn’t have a concept of nature as an active force?]. Woses are slow moving creatures that may spend centuries standing in one location undisturbed by the ebb and flow of time.

Although they practice no magic of their own [yet in the next paragraph you mention Wose Shamans?], the woses share a deep connection to faerie. What little is known of this ancient race comes from elvish [Wesnoth uses “elvish”, not “elven”] scholars who believe that this mystical power, which the mightiest slyphs and shydes dedicate their lives to master, is inherent to the wose. Though they resemble them, ˻they˼ [I would change this “they” to “woses”, since you were most recently speaking of elves, not woses] share no ancestry with ˻the˼ trees ˻themselves˼ [again, I would delete this “themselves”, and also this “the”]. It is believed that the existence of the woses may predate ˻the settlement˼ of the Great Continent itself [If you’re referring to human settlement, then I’d think that would be obvious. If you’re referring to some other race, then that should be made explicit, due to the manual being written from the human-centric perspective of a human scholar.], and that the power of faerie has given these beings the eternal task of serving as wardens of the forest.

As their lives progress, some woses gain deeper insight into the workings of the forest. Wose shamans [“shamans” should not be capitalized, unless you’re referring to the game-mechanical unit type, which would be inappropriate here], through their connection with the woodland flora, can command vines to rise up and entangle trespassers ˻within their grasp˼ [This sounds to me like it’s saying that a Wose Shaman can only entangle a trespasser that it already has within its grasp; I advise deleting this]. This ability both hinders the enemy’s ability to inflict harm on either the wose or the forest and ˻slows the escape or movement of the enemy to that of a wose˼ [This passage, and indeed the whole sentence, feels awkward to me, suggesting “slows the escape of the enemy to that of a wose or slows the movement of the enemy to that of a wose”. The first wouldn’t make sense, because the wose and its enemy generally wouldn’t be trying to escape at the same time, and the second may be referencing a game mechanic too directly. See below for my proposed rewrite.]. The power to animate the trees and plants of the forest is beyond the understanding of human magi [again, capitalizing the word would be a too-direct reference to the unit type], however [I think there should be more punctuation here; again see below] elvish shamans also share this ability and it is thought that this power over nature is granted through a deep understanding of faerie.

Woses are not warlike in the least and are ill-served in combat. [Again, you seem to have ignored zookeeper’s post, where he said that this is incorrect.] They will however respond with indiscriminate [see Wiktionary] violence in defense of their forested territory. Woses are slow moving and are vulnerable away from the woodlands. Due to their close connection with faerie, woses are very vulnerable to arcane attacks. Also, as many an ˻orcish archer˼ [I would change this to just “orc” — I’m sure that non-archer orcs have discovered this too, even if, game-mechanically, only archers exploit it.] has discovered, even the mightiest Wose can be felled by fire. The hardwood that makes the Wose ˻near impervious˼ [this should be “nearly impervious”, “near-impervious”, or “nigh-impervious” (also, are woses really nigh-impervious?)] to physical assault has left it extremely [I’d say “extremely” is too extreme, but then I’m the type who disdains hyperbole. (Then again, I wouldn’t expect a Wesnothian to describe something as “totally awesome” or the like, except perhaps in ANO.)] vulnerable to flame. Their thick bark and ability to harness ˻their faerie˼ [this doesn’t sound right to me; perhaps “the power of faerie”?] to regenerate quickly when injured allows ˻this being˼ [I’d just say “a wose”] to survive an enemy onslaught long enough to respond with a crushing might belied by its peaceful, plodding nature. Within its forest home, the Wose can disappear amongst the trees and ambush even the best-trained elvish scout.

The life span of the wose is unknown, although the most ancient members of this race have lived many hundreds of years and have grown to massive heights. It is thought that unless a wose falls in battle, it will find no natural end. Content to pass the centuries standing like a sentry, uninterested in the goings-on of the civilized world, the wose will stir only to march to the defense of the natural world and the forests it calls home.

Proposed rewrite for ¶3:
As their lives progress, some woses gain deeper insight into the workings of their forests, and the power to bend them to their will. These shamans, through their connection with the woodland flora, can command vines to rise up and entangle those who would trespass upon their domain, hindering both the arm that might swing an axe and the legs that might haste an escape. This dominion over the normally inanimate foliage of the forest is beyond the knowledge of human magi; however, elvish shamans also posses this power over nature, thought to be granted by a deep understanding of faerie.

Also, there are excess spaces before and after some paragraphs.
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Re: Proposed Race Description For Wose

Postby Kanzil » June 14th, 2013, 9:15 pm

Further nit-picking:
The mighty Wose resides within the deepest forests the known world

You've missed out the "in".
High over valleys in the red levelling rays -
In din of crowded streets, going among the years, the faces,
May I still meet my memory in so lonely a place
Between the streams and the red clouds, hearing the curlews, Hearing the horizons endure.
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