I don't think you should pay much attention to what I write as it's a personal preference, but I think the colours are way too satured. I'd tone them down, and I'd also make her spots/pattern (i.e. on her left arm) more subtle/darker/toned down, as I've done with one of them hasty to give you an idea.
Again, this is just a matter of personal taste. I'm weak for the middle-sister in the family picture you included in the top post, and think her colouring is great.
Keep on practicing and sharing. I agree with it being good training, best way is usually "learning by doing" and facing "real problems".